What Could They Possibly Mean?

Dream's are today's answers to tomorrow's questions. Well this entry was started a few weeks ago, but Christmas sort of interupted it. For any of you who don't know, I have a typical story. My neighbor and I were childhood friends and at that point, he was everything to me. I mean, I've known him since I was two. I couldn't imagine a day without him. I guess you could say he was my rock. And in sixth grade we hit a bump. I don't know what it was but we just never hung out again. And everyday I missed him in my life, because he was really important to me. Then, he went on the become this popular jock who has the cheerleader girlfriend. He's a football player, lacrosse player, and a straight A student. I guess you could say he has it all. And I turned into a nerd I guess you could say. I'm the kind of person who likes to sit in the back and likes to creep into my fantasy world (I like to write fanatsy). It's who I am. I'm a dancer, a big dorkus, and a good student. I like to have a close knit group of friends I know I can rely on, instead of a bunch of people that I don't know if they'd turn on me. So, we've grown in seperate paths. But lately, I've been having strange dreams. Again, my dreams are never of lollipops or pop stars. They usually mean something. The past few weeks, I've been having dreams about him dying. It always ends the same, either he dies in my arms, or I die in his. This also ends in the three words I fear the most in life...I LOVE YOU...and either one of us says it in these dreams. Maybe it means that it will be too late when I realize how I truly feel about him. Or maybe it means that he's always been there for me, and I'm just too naive to notice it. Or maybe it's nothing. I don't know. I do realize that I love him, and I know I'll never be brave enough to rekindle the friendship, but maybe one day I'll find the courage to face all my fears. When that day comes, he will be my first order of business. I love him in a friendship way, and I always will. Out of all the mistakes I've made in my life, and I've had my fill of mistakes, he is my biggest regret. If I had the chance to go back, I'd never of let him go.