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Saturday, August 13, 2011

Conflicted

Have you ever felt so strongly for someone or something that it scared you? I don't just mean scared, I mean terrified. Scared that you'll lose it when you don't want to. Scared that things will go great until they meet a grand ending. And that is 100% true for me. I have this new person in my life, as you already know, and things are going great right now; however, I feel like something bad is gonna happen in the end. Whenever I'm really happy, it seems there is always something that happens to ruin it. But my goal is to remain optimistic and just let the chips fall into place as much as I can. In the words of one of my wiser friends..."I have the final say in my destiny."
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8 comments:

  1. The Alpha and OmegaAugust 13, 2011 at 11:41 AM

    It will work for the best! and remembver, you have a hand in your own destiny.:)

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  2. Sinder3llaAugust 13, 2011 at 11:43 AM

    thanks Kay. I just feel like I'm one foot in and one foot out. And I want it to work out, so I am gonna work hard. It's too late to not be attached.

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  3. The Alpha and OmegaAugust 13, 2011 at 11:51 AM

    I know. But u can always get urself out. Don't torture urself if it will become too much to handle.

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  4. Sinder3llaAugust 13, 2011 at 11:54 AM

    I know. And i'm 100% positive that I won't fall in love with him. I don't really believe you can completly fall in love with someone through technology. Maybe is we called, if I saw him, something like that...then possibly. Other than that...love is not in my future.

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  5. The Alpha and OmegaAugust 13, 2011 at 11:56 AM

    kk just know ur limitations. no one is gonna judge u if u dont wanna keep going. u r allowed to save ur heart. but it's ultimately up 2 u. i like having mitchell right here. if i needed him i could call him and we can do stuff. but if he makes u happy, then go for it. :)

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  6. Sinder3llaAugust 13, 2011 at 12:00 PM

    I'm not gonna deny that it would be easier if he was here. But at the same time, I like that he can make me happy without even trying. I feel like I never have to try with him. I can be brutally honest and be myself, and he never judges me. I know my limitations, and I'm fine with them, but I do want to keep going. If I feel like I'm ultimately about to suffer a heartbreak, I'll pull the plugs and save myself before it gets to hard to handle. I know what I can and cannot handle.

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  7. The Alpha and OmegaAugust 13, 2011 at 12:01 PM

    Good :) That's all that matters

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  8. Sinder3llaAugust 13, 2011 at 12:02 PM

    Completly. I will protect my heart. And I will also enjoy the ride while it lasts.

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